Lockdown humor

Third Edition

Well-Known Member
Apr 9, 2017
820
NE Florida
Boat Info
boatless
Engines
engineless
New monthly budget: Gas $0 Entertainment $0 Clothes $0 Groceries $2,799.

Wearing a mask inside your home is now highly recommended. Not so much to stop COVID-19, but to stop eating.

Low maintenance women are having their moment right now. We don't have nails to fill and paint, roots to dye, eyelashes to re-mink, and are thrilled not to have to get dressed every day. I have been training for this moment my entire life.

When this quarantine is over, let's not tell some people.

I stepped on my scale this morning. It said: "Please practice social distancing. Only one person at a time on scale."

Not to brag, but I haven't been late to anything in over 6 weeks.

You know those car commercials where there's only vehicle on the road - doesn't seem so unrealistic these days

They can open things up next month, I'm staying in until September to see what happens to you all first.

Day 37: The garbage man placed an AA flyer on my recycling bin.

People keep asking: "Is coronavirus REALLY all that serious?" Listen y'all, the churches and casinos are closed. When heaven and hell agree on the same thing it's probably pretty serious.

Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money.

Putting a drink in each room of my house today and calling it a pub crawl.

For the second part of this quarantine do we have to stay with the same family or will they relocate us? Asking for myself

Coronavirus has turned us all into dogs. We wander around the house looking for food. We get told "No" if we get too close to strangers and we get really excited about going for walks and car rides.

The dumbest thing I've ever bought was a 2020 planner
 

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