Big decision made today

40 foot seemed like a really good size for us. Initially, the size was a bit intimidating until you get your references for where the fog lines are, then you're no worse off than any other large truck out there. In fact, I didn't realize just how much that meant until I noticed I was looking straight into the eyes of the other trucker's eyes as we rolled past them. If they can drive triples through town, there's no reason you can't maneuver your rig through equally tight areas, and more so.
We started out camping out of the back of an old Dodge van, then an ancient eighteen-foot bumper pull, twenty-two foot bumper pull behind a pickup, slide-in camper, thirty-foot fifth wheel, but the forty-foot diesel pusher with slide-outs was so amazingly roomy inside that we could park anywhere we wanted and feel like we were at home. Big tv, an actual sit-down dinner table, huge awning, and could handle all of the fresh, grey, and black water controls from one panel without ever crawling underneath the rig, not to mention the push-button auto-levelers. Get a smaller towable rig on the back for local sight-seeing and trips to the store, and hit the road. Be sure to stop by on your way through Idaho.
 
I applaud your decision but RV'ing is just as stressful.

Please consider a smaller unit that the significant other might enjoy driving vs a bus.

Heck why not just rent an rv for the 1st few years to see if it's good for the union.

You might find a SUV, a Double seat kayak, and a cabin in the woods more your liking.
 
After a couple of weeks of turmoil in my marriage, we finally sat down and had a break through in the area of communication. We got to the root cause of problem and decided that it all pointed to the boat. We spend almost every weekend on it and told ourselves and each other that we really enjoy it. After really talking about it we both came to the conclusion that we were saying we liked it for the benefit of the other. We budget $3000 a month to basically go sit at the dock. We don't take it out much because this boat really intimidates my wife and she just does not enjoy herself when under weigh. It is funny because she really did spearhead moving up from the 44 mainly because of the size of the staterooms. Anyway, we decided to go ahead and sell and get out of boating and go back to RVing instead. We enjoyed the boating for the last thirty years but we have gone everywhere that we would take this boat. I advertised it several weeks ago and got an offer with in 3 days. At the time we were still on the fence so did not accept it, but the buyers understood the position. I reached out today and expect to make a deal. We went to an RV show today and are pretty sure we know what we want. I will still hang around like a few other EX Sea Ray owners because you guys are just enjoyable to follow.
If we miss boating enough then we will jump back in at some point.
Cheers
Good luck. Hope that's the answer to your issues. Do stick around though.
 
Hate to say it Carp, but I think you did what too many do. 2 footitis. Got to keep getting bigger until it becomes so unwieldy and costly and a major pita to keep up with maintenance. An RV might be nice, then it will be, we need a bigger RV.
All you do is hang at marina now, trading that for hanging at campgrounds. Nothing will change but the scenery.
It’s not the boat that’s the problem, it’s the size of the boat. I am next to a marina with a lot of very large SR. What they have in common? They never move out of slip, all summer. The closest they come to water is the marina swimming pool. You liked boating at one time, before you flush it, maybe think about it.
But good luck in new endeavor.
PL, excellent thoughts, all valid and spot on. I do believe we took a very big step in moving up from 44 to 50 for sure. I was sure we wanted to eventually get to 60 plus so we took a larger bite. Now getting out just seems right for where we boat. There are so many more options for destinations with an RV with out the outrageous carrying costs of the hole in the water. We will see what happens. Either way this won’t change how I pull my big boy pants up.
Met with buyers again today and agreed to price and terms. All cash buying the LLC. They are taking a night to make sure it’s the right move for them then we will close probably later in the week.
Fingers crossed they are willing to make the mistake we did
 
I wish you two all the best in the road ahead. I fully understand the larger boat issues. I wanted a 48 Ocean I had looked at before I bought this boat. My wife wanted no part of it. So I compromised and got a slightly smaller boat that made her excited about getting. So if getting out is what it takes, I wish you two the best.

Question, have you ever used an RV? While there is more locations to see and maybe hang for the afternoon, there isn't that many nice places to stay overnight other then a camp ground. Camp grounds are not marina's, I would recommend renting an RV and go on a trip and test out the "waters" as it were. If you have RV'd and you like that much. more power to you. All the best.
 
I wish you two all the best in the road ahead. I fully understand the larger boat issues. I wanted a 48 Ocean I had looked at before I bought this boat. My wife wanted no part of it. So I compromised and got a slightly smaller boat that made her excited about getting. So if getting out is what it takes, I wish you two the best.

Question, have you ever used an RV? While there is more locations to see and maybe hang for the afternoon, there isn't that many nice places to stay overnight other then a camp ground. Camp grounds are not marina's, I would recommend renting an RV and go on a trip and test out the "waters" as it were. If you have RV'd and you like that much. more power to you. All the best.
I had a 28 foot Fleetwood Flair before I got married back in 89. Bought it brand new and used it when I raced in SCCA. I gave up racing when we met and found I enjoyed the weekend with my girl better than the guys at the track. Sold it after we got into boating and found it sitting more and more. Been all up and down the left coast and really enjoyed it so looking forward to getting back. Of course it has become more popular since then and competition for camp sites is different so we will see. My brother has two Diesel Pusher 40 footers that he has offered to me to use before we make the plunge. Trying now to get the wife to consider that as a first step. She is a Diamond and Denim girl though so she is not all that excited to use an older coach. She thinks it may turn her off.
 
I had a 28 foot Fleetwood Flair before I got married back in 89. Bought it brand new and used it when I raced in SCCA. I gave up racing when we met and found I enjoyed the weekend with my girl better than the guys at the track. Sold it after we got into boating and found it sitting more and more. Been all up and down the left coast and really enjoyed it so looking forward to getting back. Of course it has become more popular since then and competition for camp sites is different so we will see. My brother has two Diesel Pusher 40 footers that he has offered to me to use before we make the plunge. Trying now to get the wife to consider that as a first step. She is a Diamond and Denim girl though so she is not all that excited to use an older coach. She thinks it may turn her off.

I also gave up racing SCCA for my first wife, probably should have stayed at the track in hind sight. Glad you have the option to borrow your brothers Pusher(s), that can go a long way. If your wife will only settle for a new RV, what happens when your's isn't new anymore? Sounds like tough decisions, it's not easy when you've been together for a long time and taste's and views change. Sounds like you guys have figured it out though and that's huge. All the best.
 
Ya never know sometimes with women, one friend married over 40yrs said his wife was unhappy because he wasn't 'exciting', another married over 30yrs said his wife was wanting 'new experiences', each divorced in the end.

Hell my wife got on my butt over scrambled eggs this morning, if she can get over that maybe we'll make it to our anniversary next week, 49yrs.:)
 
I’m sure everything will work itself out. Divorce is too damn expensive and stressful. The key is to listen to her opinion and validate it without dismissing it. If she isn’t into a used coach or a rental then so be it.
 
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Ya never know sometimes with women, one friend married over 40yrs said his wife was unhappy because he wasn't 'exciting', another married over 30yrs said his wife was wanting 'new experiences', each divorced in the end.

Hell my wife got on my butt over scrambled eggs this morning, if she can get over that maybe we'll make it to our anniversary next week, 49yrs.:)
Don’t add milk to the eggs.
 
Ya never know sometimes with women, one friend married over 40yrs said his wife was unhappy because he wasn't 'exciting', another married over 30yrs said his wife was wanting 'new experiences', each divorced in the end.

Hell my wife got on my butt over scrambled eggs this morning, if she can get over that maybe we'll make it to our anniversary next week, 49yrs.:)
My mom and dad divorced after 52 years of marriage, I am really surprised they lasted that long, after us kids got out of the house, they really had nothing in common.
Maybe we need a SO thread, tell how we met our spouses, and how we got to where we are? It is almost off-boating season after all
 
You know Rusty, like me you are a builder, tinkerer, inventor, creator and have to be doing something with your mind and hands until the sun goes down. It's ingrained into our DNA. I've watched those improve RV'n life Youtube videos and they are just as passionate as boaters modifying and improving their rig. My caretaker knows that I can't do those ten day Carnival cruises as a lifestyle and understands when she is miserable or I'm miserable then both of us are miserable and we need a changeup. We never fix on a plan and always keep change in our cards. Go for the motorhome as a change but be willing to toss it aside if it doesn't tickle both of your fancy. I'll say that if I went this route I'd figure out a way to have the machine at my house so I can always tinker, stroke, hug, and modify it.
How about that remote so you can back the rig into the parking without being in the chair?
Tom
 
Hats off to both you and your wife for having the talk. A couple of friends I have didn't have the stones to do that and regret it to this day.
You can always get (or not get) another boat or rv
Glad you're going to hang around and I wish the best for the two of you wherever the road may lead....
 
I speak from experience when I say "our toys" can be a distraction, maybe avoidance or a cover, to the real relationship issues. It's the next big thing to have fun with, get excited about, until it's not. That's why I suggested a pause and a good book/and/or counselor on improving communication, "Hold Me Tight" was that book for me.
 
Carpediem44DB:

I think it is great that the two of you could open up and talk it all through. Many marriages fail because one or both can't express what is really on our minds and have fear to upset the other.

My first marriage was that way . My relationship now is not that way. We say what we want and talk it through always.

As for getting out of boating and trying something new I think it is great that you are doing so and not just sitting on the couch.

We all know that when you get into the 45 and above range on a boat it changes a lot of reasons why we love to boat. Don't get me wrong all the comforts of the bigger boat are super sweet however with comforts comes lots of systems to keep up on and just general maintenance of upkeep takes more commitment, time and money.
You also made a good point that you have boated your area for years now and that forsure can take the " adventure" away from having a boat and then you find yourself at the dock more and more.
Some days I miss my single screw 28 foot boat. so simple to run, did not cost much in fuel, could wash it in and out side in a hour, easy to beach, and if you didnt use it that was ok.

Take your time finding the right RV and make sure you both get what you want. find a good little car to tow behind and then hit the road and enjoy life.
Oh dont forget the pink flamingos and pineapple printed shirts and shorts for when your at the RV park.
I hear that is all the rage now :rolleyes:. haha

Stay in touch with us all and share your adventures.
 
Carp, just a thought about selecting an RV--many RV parks will not allow a 40' RV into their park. It also is a bit more difficult to maneuver through city traffic.

I initially looked at 40's but was convinced by friends to drop down to the 35'er that we bought.
 
You know Rusty, like me you are a builder, tinkerer, inventor, creator and have to be doing something with your mind and hands until the sun goes down. It's ingrained into our DNA. I've watched those improve RV'n life Youtube videos and they are just as passionate as boaters modifying and improving their rig. My caretaker knows that I can't do those ten day Carnival cruises as a lifestyle and understands when she is miserable or I'm miserable then both of us are miserable and we need a changeup. We never fix on a plan and always keep change in our cards. Go for the motorhome as a change but be willing to toss it aside if it doesn't tickle both of your fancy. I'll say that if I went this route I'd figure out a way to have the machine at my house so I can always tinker, stroke, hug, and modify it.
How about that remote so you can back the rig into the parking without being in the chair?
Tom
Thanks Tom, I actually have a 50 X 60 metal building 50 feet from my house that I built to use as an aircraft fab shop but abandoned when I went to work for the college. It has been my toy and tractor shed so the Motor Coach will have a nice covered home. Part of the financial justification for moving to RVing is the $1000 a month in slip and diving budget savings. Great insight as always. I have already began dreaming up ways to integrate the remote to use for retracting awnings, slideouts and levelers for sure.
Rusty
 
Carp, just a thought about selecting an RV--many RV parks will not allow a 40' RV into their park. It also is a bit more difficult to maneuver through city traffic.

I initially looked at 40's but was convinced by friends to drop down to the 35'er that we bought.

Neighbor has a Tiffin - Not the 40 you were considering but a 36'.
The thing is beautiful and has plenty of flamingo storage space. :D
 

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