Joke Thread.. post 'em if you got 'em

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People always tell me I remind them of someone. I always say, "My parents were first cousins. That's why I look so much alike".
 
After a day of fighting crime in Metropolis, Superman was in the mood for a little action. So he flew over to Wonder Woman's penthouse apartment to see if she was available. As he landed on her balcony he saw Wonder Woman lying naked on the bed with her long, muscular legs spread wide open…

Superman paused and thought for a moment, "I'm faster than a speeding bullet. I could be in there, have sex, and be out before she even knows what happened…"

Superman flew in through the open window, did his super thing in a split second, and then flew off grinning from ear to ear…

Meanwhile back on the bed, Wonder Woman asked frantically, "Did you hear something?"

"No", the Invisible Man replied, "But suddenly my butt sure hurts like hell!"
 
After nearly 50 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when the wife felt her husband, begin to massage her in ways he hadn't in quite some time.
It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then caressed her shoulders and neck.
He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, working down her side, passing gently over her hip, down her thigh and her leg to her calf. He continued in the same manner on her right side, then suddenly stopped, rolled over and became silent.
As she had become quite pleased by this caressing, and proceeded to ask in a loving voice, “Honey that was wonderful. Why did you stop?”
He responded: “I found the remote.”
 
What did the Janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?






SUPPLIES !!!
 
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